Alpha Epsilon Nu - University of San Francisco
Fall 2016: NUsletter #2
Bigs/Lils Reveal is one of Alpha Phi Omega's most important and fun events! It is a time where each Pledge is paired up with their Big Brother from our fraternity to receive mentorship, guidance, and support during the pledging process. Though we stress having no expectations leading up to revealing, it is exciting and nerve-wracking to find out who your bigs or littles is. After revealing, the relationship between bigs and littles grow, strengthening the bond between the two. This NUsletter was created to capture the different types of relationships of brothers and pledges in the fraternity.
Prompt 1 (for pairs who got matched this semester): How was Reveal? Were you able to guess who your Bigs/Lils was? How has your relationship developed in the first few weeks? What's one thing you'd like your Bigs/Lils to know?
Prompt 2 (for Brothers who didn't get matched this semester): What do you remember from your own Reveal? How has your relationship developed with your Bigs/Lils? What's one thing you'd like your Bigs/Lils to know?
My bigs is ALYSA ABENOJAR :)
Going into reveal, I really didn't know what to expect. My pbros and I would talk about how anxious yet excited we were to find out who our bigs were, and when the day finally came, we all just wanted to meet our bigs and our families. From what other brothers and pledge team told us, I knew that I just had to trust the process, have an open mind, and just have fun and not expect anything to go a certain way. During speed dating, I really liked talking to Alysa, and it was so easy to connect with her. I had hoped that I would get paired with her, and she was one of my top 5 choices, but of course I didn't want to get my hopes up so I didn't think I would get paired with her. I thought she was genuinely nice and excited to be at speed dating, and I just got a happy vibe from being around her.
On reveal night, I was actually really surprised to see her when she pulled off her blanket, and I was so happy! Later on, a lot of the brothers came up to me and said they knew I'd be paired with Alysa, and they could see us as a bigs/lils pair ever since they saw us in a room together. Over these past few weeks Alysa and I have grown closer even though we don't necessarily talk to or see each other everyday. We always check up on each other though, and she's so encouraging and always offers to help me out since she knows I get stressed about a lot of things really easily. I really appreciate how supportive Alysa is, and how we both love the Chainsmokers. I also love how we have the same hair color, how we're both tiny, and how we have the same IG name. Bigs, if you're reading this, thanks for welcoming me into our cute family and for being so sweet to me all the time. I'm so blessed that I got you as a bigs and I'm super happy pteam put us together because you're making my pledging process so much more worthwhile. I love you, bigs!!!
- Alyssa Jacala, FH3 Fall 2016
Bigs and Littles reveal for me was probably my favorite part of the whole pledging process. I remember being super overwhelmed and emotional before, during, and after reveal. I remember on the day of reveal I couldn’t even pay attention in class because I was just too excited. I could not wait to have someone be my support system during the pledging process and most importantly have a friend that is interested in the same things as me! My Big welcomed me into the line with a poster that said “LIL’S WHAT’S GOOD?” and a video from all the members of the family welcoming me. I also got to meet my great grandbig Minh and grand Royce after reveal when they were djing a campus event. I knew at that moment that I was placed in the “musically-inclined” line. We also went for some King of Thai right after.
Ever since I got my big, Christian Caddali, our relationship has developed further than just being my support system during the pledging process. Outside of APHIO, we both participate in VarCity (I’m on Junior VarCity) and it’s so cool to have him perform with me and share my love of dancing with! Overtime I’ve discovered so many things that I share in common with him and my entire line (it’s actually pretty weird). One thing I’d like to say to my bigs that I am so incredibly fortunate to have you in my life and to have the greatest family line ever. You’ve been nothing but supportive of me during and after the pledging process. Thank you for listening to me cry, laugh, whine, and accepting me for being the dramatic little princess I am HAHA. I am so sad that you’re graduating this semester and leaving me to fend for myself :( LOL jk! I am going to miss your talented and smart sassy self around me so much. I hope I am as good a bigs as you when I get my littles next semester. I can’t wait to continue the line and make you proud :) I LOVE YOU!
- Anelise Teodoro, PMP Fall 2015
Reveal was exciting and very nerve racking. The days prior to reveal, I had no idea who my Bigs was going to be. I honestly had no clue. The hints that our Pmoms were sending out made no sense to me at all. Some of my Pbros had a pretty good idea of who they got and everyone was trying to help each other out, but when I told people my hints, they had no idea either. So after a few days of trying to figure out who my Bigs was, I just kind of gave up because I just decided I’d rather be surprised than try to guess. When going to reveal I didn’t know what to expect because I didn’t know how they would go through the whole process. I thought the way they chose to do reveal was really cute. When my Bigs, Chanelle Mariano, revealed herself, I was so surprised. I remember talking to her before, but I wasn’t really close with her. And she wasn’t at speed dating because she had to be somewhere. I was kind of nervous about that because I didn’t know how we would get along. But when she revealed herself, I was still really excited because I wanted a girl as my Big. It was so funny that night because everyone was coming up to us saying that we could be related because we have the same hair and that we kind of look alike.
The first week Chanelle and I hung out, I was kind of scared because I’m not very good with new people and I feel like I’m really awkward. It’s hard for me to make connections with people. But when we hung out, it was so easy to talk to her. We just ate some Chinese food and talked about anything that came to mind. As we were talking, it became very obvious that we had a lot in common. We’ve only had two bondings so far but I feel like our Bigs/Littles relationship is in a really good place. Something I want to tell my Bigs is that I have major love for her. I feel as though we have very similar personalities so we both kind of understand what kind of relationship we want. My Bigs is beautiful and independent and I have so much respect for her!
- Jada Giron, FH3 Fall 2016
- Jeffrey Gomez, FH3 Fall 2016
For my pledge class, Fred Heismeyer III, reveal was on Friday, September 30, 2016. It was really fun, as it started off with all of my fellow pledge brothers and I gathered in a classroom where we were instructed by our pledge parents Amy Nguyen, Vanni Aurelio and Natalie Montoya to divide up into groups. From there, we went on a scavenger hunt which led us back to a room filled with tangled color strings that you had to follow to a pair of socks. The color of our string represented our family line, and the socks corresponded with our bigs as they were hidden with only their feet showing.
I was not able to guess who my bigs was. We were given clues, yet they were only three words and one of the words had been switched out so it was two truths one lie. That really made things confusing, so I stopped trying to figure it out and just waited for reveal so that the surprise would be that much more pleasing and enjoyable.
My relationship with my big has really grown over the first few weeks, as I feel very comfortable with her and can trust her with almost anything I need. I contact her whenever I need help with anything regarding the process, and she is always there to support me and guide me through it. She also is very blunt, and will not sugar coat anything if I am really messing up or not doing things right. However, we also have a lot in common so she is also really fun to hang out with. I really appreciate how she consistently checks up with me to make sure I have all my things done, as I need someone to constantly keep me on track.
If there was one thing I would want my bigs to know, it would be that I truly appreciate everything she does for me from the bottom of my heart and there is no other person that I would have wanted to have been paired up with. I may be quiet and lazy at times, but I do recognize all the times you are there for me and have supported me.
During the day of Reveal, I remember being really excited to find out who my bigs would be, and the activities my pledge class did that night just hyped me up even more. I wasn’t able to guess who my bigs was because the clue I got was “i luv pho” and that was Amy’s license plate and I was pretty sure it couldn’t be her lol.
During reveal I found out my bigs was Jerwin. I remembered that during the day of speed dating he didn’t have a slot on the sheet so the pledge team had to describe him, so I knew him as the guy who played basketball. Not gonna lie, he intimidated me because he reminded me so much of my older cousin. We also didn’t talk much that night because he always seemed to go off to talk to his friends instead. It bummed me out because I also heard that he expected someone else to be his littles.
That night I met my Blackout line and I couldn’t be happier that we had so many people in the family. A lot of them reached out to me for the first couple weeks as I got situated with my bigs. It really surprised me when he wouldn’t let me leave his place until I finished all my requirements the night before midpoint. It really showed that he cared and I really appreciated it.
Jerwin and I eventually started hanging out more often. This week, we played basketball in Koret because he really likes basketball, but I haven’t played basketball in like a year. It turned out to be really fun and it reminded me how much I used to love it too. He got me to sign up for the upcoming tournament in November. It sounds really fun but I hope I get a little better before aha.
Something I would want him to know is that he shouldn’t feel the need to try really hard to be my bigs. He can be himself around me. Being my bigs shouldn’t have to feel like another job, so he should have fun with it too.
- Jeremiah Espino, FH3 Fall 2016
The Bigs/Littles reveal will definitely be a moment from this process that I will never forget. The whole reveal process was very well thought out and put through and overall was the cutest idea ever. I loved the thought of our reveal process to be double blind compared to other reveals since it made it a little more fun for both the pledges and the brothers. I especially loved the idea of having to find our own pair of socks given to us from our Bigs and then having to find the socks that match ours.
At first, I had absolutely no idea who my Bigs was due to the clue that I was given. I had the clue “suck my blankets” and I was honestly so confused as to who it could be. As reveal week continued on, I managed to have more of a clue about who my Bigs is. With the help of brothers, help from my pbros and the second clue we were given, a couple of us were able to narrow down to two or three brothers who could potentially be my Bigs. Eventually I narrowed it down to two people and luckily, my Bigs was definitely one of the two that I was hoping for.
The relationship between my Bigs and I has definitely gotten closer. Although it was really easy to open up and just talk to her, I’ve been able to get a lot comfortable around her. Now, I can easily joke around with or bring up and problem that I’m going through, knowing that my Bigs always has the right thing to say and that she’ll guide me down the right path. The fact that I’m guaranteed to see my Bigs at least two to three times a week due to VarCity practice also helps me become more comfortable and be myself around her. We’re also very alike in personality so helps as well.
One thing that I would like my Bigs to know, even though I tell her this a lot, is that I feel blessed to have such an amazing Bigs and she’s definitely my role model. Oh, and that I love her very much!
- Marianna Mabanag, FH3 Fall 2016
Reveal is one of my favorite memories in APO so far. I remember that after speed dating, I had no idea who to choose for my top 5 because, seriously, I was okay with getting anyone. Of course, there were a few that I really wanted to get paired with, but I told myself not to have any expectations because I didn’t want to be disappointed. I remember a lot of brothers telling me that my pledge team cares a lot about our pledge class and that they’re not going to put you with anyone you’re not going to match with, but still I couldn’t help but be anxious.
Up until the moment I got my bigs, I had no idea who it was going to be because my clues were SO HARD. (I got “fluffy, target, tomato”) When they lifted up their blankets and I saw that I got Victoria, it was so funny because I remembered her but I didn’t know her name and she didn’t know mine either. It was pretty much like we were meeting for the first time, which was a little awkward, but because I didn’t have any expectations, I was actually really hopeful and positive that we would click perfectly. Also, when I saw all of my pledge brothers meeting their bigs for the first time, it sounds so stupid, but it all made sense to me (who got paired with who). It made me really grateful for my pledge team because from reveal, I saw that they really do care a lot about us and they knew who we would match with before some of us even knew it ourselves.
Over the past few weeks, I’ve gotten to know my bigs a lot more and seriously (I say this in every weekly bonding report), she’s the perfect bigs for me. :’) I hella relate to her and she reminds me a lot of myself. She’s super blunt, but in the best way, which is great because I’m the same way… lmao. We’ve definitely gotten a lot closer and I feel like I can tell her anything and really depend on her to be there for me when I need it.
Message for my bigs: I’m super grateful for you and seriously, I can’t imagine myself having anyone else as my bigs. I’m trying really hard to finish strong in pledging (& school & life in general) to make you proud! :’) i luh u bih
